In dissolving a marriage, emotions are all wrapped around your future and it is tough to see right from wrong. You want to take action and protect your family all the while it is being torn apart by the woman that you loved, or perhaps still do love. You want to protect that relationship and it is painful that it is being torn up.

The facts are you need to protect your future. There is a life for you on the other side of the divorce but not if you throw it away with self-destructive behavior, stupid actions, and doing things to take care of her. Face it – she is out for herself.

What you need to do now is slow your thoughts down and trust.

How do you slow your thoughts down?

The easiest way I know is thought replacement. Your mind is racing off on a tragic end to everything and that is all you can see or think of. This is where you replace that thought with an answer. If you are religious then follow Norman Vincent Peale’s ideas about using scriptures. Your response might b e “I can do all things through Christ who strengtheneth me.” Not religious, not Christian, no problem, the same strategy works with great quotes that have meaning for you. Great quotes like Emerson’s: “do the thing and you shall have the power,” or Perseus, “he conquers who endures.” Find some meaningful quotes that empower you and use them over and over, as needed, to answer these destructive thoughts. Do this because you need to take smart action and not action out of fear or anger. You need this to anchor you and to keep you looking forward.

Now that you are managing yourself, begin to think of what you want out of this, what you need to support your new life. Take this information and begin to manage your divorce, manage your lawyer. Don’t think you can get a satisfactory outcome by outsourcing your divorce to your attorney, no, no, no. Attorneys are busy and you need to stay on top of it to be sure it is done correctly.

These are the first steps to winning your divorce when you are ready for the next step just click the link or go directly to http://www.formendivorce.com/.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Renee_Pullman
http://EzineArticles.com/?Divorce-For-Men,-How-to-Break-Free-of-Your-Own-Destructive-Thoughts-and-Take-Charge-of-Your-Divorce&id=4635834

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By Renee Pullman

With divorce for men it is reality that in 2 out of three cases the wife will file and the man will be served divorce papers. This is a strategic advantage for her because many times the judge will grant motions in this filing. You may be accused of abuse and put out of your home.

If this has happened to you take heart, it is only a temporary set back if you act quickly and in the right way. Being a man, you are at a disadvantage, in most courts presumption goes in favor of the wife. Now you have a second burden in that she has filed first. At this point it is probably best for you to have an attorney. This is not the end of your participation in your divorce however. There is no one who will care more about what happens next and in the future than you. Don’t trust this just to your divorce attorney. These people are busy and things will go undone. You need to learn the divorce tactics and strategies that are being used against you, and you need to learn what needs to be done to counter them and manage your case. Charges made against you need to be countered. You cannot let untruth stand unanswered.

Here are three tips that can save you not only a great deal of money but that can take some of the pain away from the divorce process.

1. When you look for your attorney be aware that women lawyers can be some of the most aggressive when fighting for their clients. So just because your wife has waged war against you don’t think you need a man to counter her.
2. Keep your head in the game. Her attorney has attacked and the purpose, beyond strategic advantage is to get you off-balance and angry. When you are angry you are more apt to do stupid things. These things will not go well for you in court and could wind you up in jail. She and her attorney will probably celebrate that achievement. So if pain and anger wiles up inside of you, you have to be ready to counter it with something. Take no physical action but direct all of this negative energy into learning the divorce process and what is possible to attain.
3. Expect a positive result. One thing to realize is you really don’t want her. Sometimes marriages end amicably but more often there are issues and betrayal that create negativity between you and your wife. This can hurt and make you think the world has ended but I promise you it has not. I promise you that there will be a good life for you on the other side of this divorce if you maintain expectancy and manage your case. If things begin to weigh on you, take a moment and go forward in time and see your great new life on the other side of this thing. Remember that you will be bringing all the things you need from this marriage to help you achieve it. See it, believe it. Wayne Dyer said, “you must believe it before you see it.” Believe it this is some of the most sound advice you will ever get.

Win your divorce! Divorce for men means learning all of the tactics and strategies that will give you the insider information to come out of divorce court without losing everything. Divorce Strategy for Men is insider tactics and strategies that will help you prevail in your divorce.

http://www.squidoo.com/DivorceForMen is all about divorce for men – tactics, strategy, and how to keep your money, your kids, and your stuff.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Renee_Pullman
http://EzineArticles.com/?Divorce-For-Men,-She-Filed-and-Youve-Been-Served,-What-Now?&id=4386298

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Men facing divorce have a built in disadvantage, they face a bias and often it is difficult for men to overcome it. The bias is mostly cultural but there are also laws and procedures that give the edge to women in a divorce. For men, divorce means built in disadvantages, but disadvantages that you can overcome with tactics and strategy. You may discover that not only is there a cultural bias against men in the courts but also outside, your friends and neighbors. Still there are many good strategies and tactics for men in divorce and you can win this thing.

Just because you are divorcing you haven’t gotten away from dealing with your soon to be ex, a big tactic that the other side may bring against you is doing things just to rattle you. They want to keep you off balance and if possible get you to do something stupid that will cost you in court. So… keep your head together as you find them taking trivial things and blowing them out of proportion. Do you really want the family dog enough to spend thousands fighting over him?

Stay away from trivial it will cost you big time and it will take your attention from the things you really care about. So know your outcome, know what it is that you want. You want to avoid needing to have the last word. Don’t argue about anything, express yourself but avoid the anger and turmoil. Remember you don’t need the last word on things as you negotiate, you need to have the last word in court.

By the way – an interesting statistic – most people start up their divorces during football season, go figure.

Next, stay positive, if you get off into depression, if you get down and stop believing in your power to turn the divorce in your direction will cause you to not focus and pay attention to the things you want from the divorce. That can cost you big time. You’ve got to remember that no one cares more about the outcome of your divorce than you. You have to stay involved, and not avoiding involvement in your divorce. Your lawyer is busy, don’t trust it just to him. Make sure you stay involved and keep managing things. You are the one with a new life on the other side of divorce and you are the one to insure that you win the things that you need to make it happen successfully.

Divorce for men is full of pitfalls but you can learn the methods and tactics to prevail. Gain the insider information to come out of divorce court without losing everything.

http://www.squidoo.com/DivorceForMen is all about divorce for men – tactics and strategy, and how to keep your money, your kids, and your stuff.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Renee_Pullman
http://EzineArticles.com/?A-Man-Facing-Divorce-Can-Lose-Everything,-Discover-Divorce-For-Men-Tactics-and-Take-the-Advantage&id=4274964

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Divorce for men can be a challenge but it is one that you can rise to. How often have your heard the familiar story, “she took the kids, the house, and the car.” Then the story continues with the support horror story and how she holds you hostage over the kids vitiation. In some cases men talk about being in and out of court every few years to have even more of their already decimated income taken from them. And what does she do with it? Is she visiting the spa and health club to keep her new man happy? You hear these stories all the time but this doesn’t have to be you.

1. The first thing you have to do is educate yourself so you can take control of your own divorce case. You may not be a lawyer but you must come to understand enough of the divorce process that you can manage your case, help set strategy, and manage your attorney. Don’t try to outsource your divorce and expect things to go well for you. Understand the process and take control.
2. Don’t buy into the myth that you are going to drop a fortune. As you begin to understand the process and manage it you will learn ways to save big time. On the other hand the guy’s who try to outsource their divorces normally wind up paying big time. You must remain in control.
3. Believe in an outcome that supports your new life, the life you will have when this marriage is ended, is the next thing to get your mind around. Don’t buy into common knowledge — common knowledge says you are at such a disadvantage in divorce court that you have no chance. This attitude will cause you to lose. Don’t buy into this, there is no advantage that she has (yes the woman does have an advantage in divorce courts), there is no advantage where there is not an effective strategy for men to overcome it.
4. Keep your eyes on the future, begin to plan your new life and look forward to it. Looking to the future will help keep you from wallowing in the past and in any current mess that you may perceive that you have.
5. Plan your divorce strategy. It has been said many times, “failing to plan is planning to fail.” Follow proven and winning strategy and come out of this thing with the settlement that you want.

Divorce for men means that you must work out an effective plan and strategy. You can come through your divorce without losing everything.

Divorce for men means learning all of the tactics and strategies that will give you the insider information to come out of divorce court without losing everything. Divorce Strategy for Men is insider tactics and strategies that will help you prevail in your divorce.

http://www.squidoo.com/DivorceForMen is all about divorce for men – tactics, strategy, and how to keep your money, your kids, and your stuff.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Renee_Pullman
http://EzineArticles.com/?Divorce-For-Men,-Manage-Your-Own-Case&id=3834659

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When we think of abuse in marriage, everyone assumes that it is the husband who is abusing the wife. This assumption happens whether the abuse is emotional or physical.

Yes, “Abused Men” are more common than you might think: there are many marriages where the wife abuses and demeans her husband. In much the same way that women suffer abuse at the hands of men and they keep going back to him because their self-esteem is destroyed, so it is that men stay in abusive relationships.

In our articles we’ve been talking about men being at a disadvantage in divorce court. This is an even bigger problem if the wife has been abusive. The man is both shamed and emasculated. He will have problems talking with a friend, counselor, attorney or anyone else in a position to help him. Women have difficulty with this too but it is an accepted norm that men are abusers and the wife bears no blame. But a man, he must be a wus to let a woman treat him that way and this can happen through even though the husband is bigger and stronger than the wife.

This article is not about the theory of why people (men and women) allow themselves to stay in an abusive relationship. Rather it is a call to action to get you to remove yourself, and keep yourself away from an abusive relationship. You simply must get out of it, you must find someone to help you muster the courage to do it.

You need to put shame aside; people do much worse things everyday than to allow themselves to be abused. You’ve really done nothing wrong and you should acknowledge the courage you are calling on to do something about your situation. It is unfortunate that in many communities you will not find organizations to help you. However, there is a National Domestic Violence Hot line that you can Google up and get in touch with people who can help you find resources. Don’t put this off.

Some men feel further trapped because they believe they will lose everything in a divorce. While this does happen, it doesn’t need to happen to you. There are divorce strategies for men that will help you avoid “the men’s divorce penalty.” Sure it is real, but if you learn to work the system instead of letting it work against you then you can overcome it. Read books, talk to attorneys, do what you have to do but learn the system so you can leverage it in your favor.

Divorce for abused men: learn all of the tactics and strategies that will give you the insider information to come out of divorce court without losing everything. “Divorce Strategy for Men” is insider tactics and strategies that will help you prevail in your divorce.

http://www.squidoo.com/DivorceForMen is all about divorce for men – tactics, strategy, and how to keep your money, your kids, and your stuff.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Renee_Pullman
http://EzineArticles.com/?Abused-Men,-the-Best-Divorce-Strategy&id=3767012

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